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unionjack

Well-known member
Joined
May 3, 2011
Messages
792
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Location
Essex Boy
I was devastated to find out my wife was having an affair but, by

turning to religion, I was soon able to come to terms with the whole

thing. I converted to Islam. We're stoning her in the morning.

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The wife suggested I get myself one of those dick enlargers, so I

did... she's 21 and her name's Lucy.

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Went to the pub with my girlfriend last night. Locals were shouting

"pedophile" and other names at me just because my girlfriend is 21 and

I'm 50. It completely spoiled our 10th anniversary.

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Following the tragic death of the Human Cannonball at the Kent Show, a

spokesman said "We'll struggle to get another man of the same calibre."

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My son was thrown out of school today for letting a girl in his class

give him a hand-job. I said "Son, that's three schools this year. You'd

better stop before you're banned from teaching altogether."

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Question - Are there too many immigrants in Britain?

17% said Yes;11% said No;72% said "I am not understanding the question

please."

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The cost of living has now gotten so bad that my wife is having sex

with me because she can't afford batteries.
 
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